Masturbation frequency while dating

Q. I am 23 and my boyfriend is 18. We’ve been together for a year. Is it normal for him and all other guys to masturbate even though the female gives them sex?

A. It’s great that you asked this question because it’s a common concern, especially among young women. It is perfectly natural for both men and women to continue to masturbate, even though they are in a fully functional sexual relationship. Check out the Male Masturbation Guide to learn more. In the meantime, there are two important areas you need to give consideration to.

First, don’t compare masturbation with sex. You’re not inadequate because he continues to masturbate, nor should you feel like you have to ‘put out’ in order to keep up with him. Some peoples’ libidos are fulfilled by having sex; others find that sex increases it.

Secondly, men have been brought up with a positive association towards masturbation, whereas women have not had the same encouragement. What’s more, your boyfriend is at the peak age for masturbation, so his physical desire to get it on is theoretically the highest it’ll ever be in his life! For this reason alone, you don’t have to feel so bad that your sex drive doesn’t mirror his. It’s more satisfying for both parties when you engage in sex because you really want to.

Read/Add a Comments (6)

I am in a great relationship

Submitted by xjjx on Fri, 07/02/2010 - 15:10.

I am in a great relationship and I still masturbate. I do it more to relieve my own sexual tension because it feels like I could screw 10 times a day and still want more lol... If I don't do it I find that I try to push her more and more for sex and she quickly gets annoyed when she isn't up for it.

Login or register to post comments *
report spam

It's a good thing

Submitted by Cherry Kay on Tue, 05/18/2010 - 21:03.

I dated a guy that had had a slew of short term relationships before he met me. When he and I became serious we were having sex once or twice a week. Sex makes you happy, so if you want to feel happy but your partner is unavailable for some reason just take care of your urges yourself. He was concerned about masturbating more than ever, but I told him as long as he still sought me out and preferred me over his hand we had no problem.
If I want a quickie I know there is no way my guy can rev me up to climax quick enough. I have gone solo many a time before leaving for work.

Login or register to post comments *
report spam

Same problem

Submitted by Nekox6 on Thu, 01/07/2010 - 00:37.

I hear ya, I have the same problem with my boyfriend, he's 15, I'm 14 (we're 5 months apart) and he still masturbates eventhough we get to sexually pleasure eachother once in a while...I know its not very often that we get to so I try to understand (hell I've masturbated once or twice a week b4 my period wen I'm rly horny) Thats besides the point tho, we're very open with eachother and he has no problem whatsoever with me doing that every once in a blue moon...but me on the other hand, eventhough I try not to, I get really upset when he does it (which is y I rarely ever do it myself anymore...but him touching me feels much better) because it makes me feel like I don't do a good enough job for him and it rly bothers me. I don't wanna tell him to stop, but I have told him about it and he says thats not the reason at all and that it feels much better when I do it for him anyway. How can I get over being upset about this?

Login or register to post comments *
report spam

its normal

Submitted by Caramel_Gal_Lov... on Mon, 01/04/2010 - 20:41.

It's very normal to masturbate even though you are in a relationship. You can even do it with eachother to show one another how you both like to be touched.