SexInf101.com's Sex Blog:

DEFINITION: Exotic repertoire of sexual positions practiced in cars, in shop doorways and behind dumpsters (skips) on Saturday nights.

28 Jul 10

One in every four women suffers from uterine fibroids. A new focussed MRI treatment promises to be a painless, quick, hospitalisation-free solution to the problem.

Uterine fibroids are fast becoming one of the most common gynaecological problems among women today. They are essentially tumours that occur within the inner layers of the uterus. Most are non-cancerous, and common symptoms include painful and heavy menstruation, painful sexual intercourse, backache, constipation or frequent urination.

The MRI guided focussed ultrasound (MRgFUS) is a new painless and non-invasive procedure that promises to rid women of fibroids, and Mumbai's Jaslok Hospital is pioneering the MRI (Magnetic Resonance Imaging) treatment in Asia. It claims to be an accurate way to determine the location of the fibroid. It works by focussing a fine beam of ultrasound waves on the fibroid, raising the temperature within it such that the blood flow to it is restricted, causing the fibroid to eventually 'burn'.

The procedure involves no hospitalisation or anaesthesia. "The MRgFUS treatment has absolutely no side-effects. It doesn't cause damage to the uterus or ovaries. Fertility, conception and ability to bear a child aren't affected either," says Dr Rishma Dhillon Pai, consultant gynaecologist, Jaslok Hospital. The treatment cost is almost on par with surgery. Patients whom Dr Pai has treated using MRgFUS, have managed to return to work the following day, she says.

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A guy walked into a bar one day and said to the barman, "Give me six double vodkas."

The barman says, "Wow! you must have had one hell of a day."

"Yeah, I just found out my oldest son is gay."

The next day, the same guy came into the bar and asked for the same drinks. When the bartender asked what the problem was today the answer came back, "I just found out that my youngest son is gay, too!"

On the third day, the guy came into the bar and ordered another six double vodkas. The bartender said, "Jesus! Doesn't anybody in your family like women?"

The man downed the first drink and shook his head, "Yeah, my wife!"

MYTH: If you lose weight all over your body, there's a pad of fat that is located at the base of your penis that will also shrink - this pad of fat is where part of your penis hides when it's erect, and where even more hides when it's not erect. Losing this pad of fat may make the appearance of the penis larger, but it will not actually grow.

DEFINITION: A self-deluded female with a horrible fat backside who believes she looks good in in tight jeans or hipsters.

A man calls the Animal Control in his town, because there is a crazed gorilla on his roof, and he can't figure out how to get it down safely. Soon, a van pulls up, and an old man gets out, carrying a small dog, a baseball bat, and a gun. He hands the man the gun.

"Okay, here's what we do. I'm going to go up onto your roof, and threaten the gorilla with this baseball bat until he falls down. When he falls down, this little dog will bite him in the balls until he's incapacitated."

"Great," says the man. "But what's the gun for?"

"In case I fall down instead of the gorilla -- shoot the dog."

TRUTH: When it comes to douching, the opposite is true. Douching will actually push sperm farther up the vagina. Besides, by the time you make it to the bathroom, millions of sperm have already made their way through the vagina.

Urinating also has no effect on conception. Urine comes out the urethra, which is in no way connected to the vagina or uterus. However, it is a good idea to urinate before and after sex to get rid of any bacteria that could cause infection in the vagina.

6 Jul 10

Ever since Viagra met blockbuster success in 1998, the drug industry has sought a similar pill for women.

Now, a German drug giant says it has stumbled upon such a pill and is trying to persuade the Food and Drug Administration that its drug can help restore a depressed female sex drive. The effort has set off a debate over what constitutes a normal range of sexual desire among women, with critics saying the company is trying to turn a low libido into a medical pathology.

Recently, an F.D.A. staff report recommended against approving the drug, saying the maker, Boehringer Ingelheim, had not made its case and that the benefits of the daily pill did not outweigh its side effects, which included dizziness, nausea and fatigue.

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DEFINITION: A lady that blows the first time you turn her on.

A father passing by his son's bedroom, was astonished to see the bed was nicely made, and everything was picked up. Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed, 'Dad.' With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands...

Dear, Dad.

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mum and you. I've been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so nice, but I knew you would not approve of her, because of all her piercing's, tattoos, her tight Motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much older than I am.

But it's not only the passion, Dad. She's pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't, really hurt anyone.

We'll be growing it for ourselves, and trading it with the other people in the commune, for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want.

In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it!

Don't worry Dad, I'm 15, and I know how to take care of myself. Someday, I'm sure we'll be back to visit, so you can get to know your many grandchildren.

Love, your son, Joshua.

P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Jason's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the school report that's on the kitchen table. Call when it is safe for me to come home...